Runners….but, why? I ask because I do not, for the life of me, fathom how people become “runners.” In the spirit of full disclosure I have, in the past (the distant past), tried my hand at running. I’ve always enjoyed certain forms of exercise, but running has never been one. However at one point I started to wish it was, because it was a lot less expensive than what I had been paying for my kickboxing classes/yoga classes/wine tasting trips. That last one just slipped in there. I quickly learned couldn’t hang in the running world. Maybe more so didn’t want to than couldn’t. I hated it. I actually had a visceral response to it. This included obsessively checking my watch to see how much time had passed (normally it was about 25 seconds more than the previous time I checked) and mentally berating myself for deciding to do it in the first place.
Most runners I’ve talked to about this, in my pursuit to understand, have said that it’s because running is “decompression time.” Time to clear their minds or to work through and process whatever is going on in their lives. (I mainly tried to process the fact that my knees hurt while simultaneously clutching my side due to the sharp stabbing pains I was experiencing.) That part I do understand, as should everyone, because we all need something that allows us to work through our shit. I’ve learned first hand what happens when you don’t make the aforementioned shit-processing a priority. That happened after I had our first daughter, as I mentioned in my first post, and it took a while until I even realized what the problem was. I was mentally un-stimulated and lacking a sufficient outlet for my thoughts and emotions. Not a winning combo.
This brings me to the title of this post. Writing serves me in the same way that running serves those masochistic “runner folk” (no offense, I still sometimes kind of wish I liked it). But when I’m writing and can get into a really good flow, it can be like a meditation of sorts. It can also be cathartic, especially if I’m writing about my own experiences or ‘free writing’ whatever comes to mind to get the creativity flowing.
Someone once told me that our minds are like rain barrels. Your rain barrel can be filled to the brim, full of everything you’re dealing with in life, and if it’s kept at this level, just one tiny drop (your kid uses your lipstick for wall décor, or your dog uses your carpet as a bathroom perhaps) can cause it to overflow-for you to lose it and for things to feel unmanageable. So we all need to proactively drain our rain barrels. We need to find whatever it is for us that gives us a mental reset, makes us better able to handle all the ‘rain’ life throws at us, and gives us an outlet for how we’re feeling.
Writing is how I drain my rain barrel. It’s my “running”…minus the cardiovascular benefits. But, then again, someone also once told me that drinking a glass of red wine a night is equivalent to spending an hour in the gym (here’s proof-you’re welcome)…so if you need me I’ll be over here with my laptop and my glass of Apothic Red, workin’ through my shit, and workin’ on my fitness.